It smells like rain in the air

Leila sits in a bar next to her school having her first whisky at 4:30 in the afternoon. It is sunny outside but the heat would make her flush even more. She reads the text message again "Meet me for a drink tonight?" It was from Jake, someone she knows well even though they have only known each other for no more than a month. She plays the cell phone in her palm, hesitating to reply, but eventually sends out "Sure, come to Summer Blue."

Jake arrives, sits himself next to her on the couch. It is a green couch with white dots; it is a cozy couch. "So, how did it go?"

"I have filled out the application yesterday afternoon..."

"Finally!"

"And if nothing goes wrong, I should have the renewal of my paper in two weeks."

"Congratulations! That is good news."

"Yeah, thanks. How is your new apartment?"

"Good. It is messy, so I don't want my daughter to be in it until next weekend, after I clean up everything. After your paper, you will have more freedom."

"This freedom to stay has cost me, a lot."

"More than it should. Can I get you another one? Ballantine's double?"

"The only thing I drink. Thank you."

"If you ever need a place to spend the night to have some rest, you can come over. You know where I live."

"Thank you." She takes a sip from the glass, feels his hand on hers, "Leila, you have to leave. He is not good for you. "

"I know." She pulls away his hand, reaches the backpack to get some rolling tobacco and filters. "It is not the time. "

"Sooner is better. You can come and stay with me."

Leila could usually drink more, but today, after the third shot, she is more than buzzed. "I have to go. We will catch up later." She doesn't wait for his reply, stands up and leaves the bar. Just a couple of steps outside, her head starts to spin and she almost falls. She leans against the wall and sees Jake next to her. "I will accompany you back." They get into the metro; as the train brakes in the next station, her balance get thrown off, she finds herself in his arms. She kisses his lips and holds him tight. "I feel so fine with you Leila, I don't know why but I just do. " Somehow such statement wakes her up. She says that she would have to get off soon and thanks him for the company. She leaves him in the metro without saying goodbye and walks back to the flat as fast as she could. It is dark but warm inside, she hits the bed right away and the next thing she knows is when she wakes up at midnight, realizes she is still fully clothes and Christopher sitting in front of the TV but asleep. Leila turns on the light and reads until she can fall back to sleep again. The last time she looks at the clock it was 4AM. Then she is awaken by a phone call, from Simone.

"Want to take some coffee together?"

"I am still in bed, give me an hour. I need to take a shower."

"Alright. Meet me at the coffee shop on Fold Street in an hour or so?"

"Sure."

Leila can feel her head still spins as she walks down the street. It is raining and there is scarcely anyone on the street. Suppose everyone is still in bed at 9AM on Saturday morning.

"Tried to call you last night, but you didn't answer. I was wondering if you fancy to go theater with me."

"Yeah, I passed out quite early. Sorry about that. Did you go?"

"No. I stayed at home instead. How are you?"

"Having a hangover and you? Any news from your job applications?"

"I think I will continue to work with Christopher in his new office. It was surprisingly quick that he built up a new office in a month."

"Yes, it is."

"How is he?"

"I don't know. Haven't seen him really."

"The last time I saw him was a few days ago. I guess he is drinking less now, is he?"

"Can't tell you. I haven't really seen him."

"He took your threat of leaving serious didn't he?"

"I've never threatened him. And I am not the one to talk. Gulping down two bottles of Ballantine's every week and I can't keep up my weight. Who am I to talk about having a healthy life style?"

"Everything will be better after his new office starts running. He is trying his best to be the person you want him to be."

"What was the play about? Do you still want to go tonight?"

"I am working tonight. I can't believe that I am a lawyer and working in a bar. But it is a good bar though, in the theater and you meet interesting people."

"At least you don't hate it."

"Christopher told me that there was a new flat just became available down the street. Maybe I can go and take a look next week."

"Apartment hunting is a pain isn't it?"

"Yes it is."

Leila's phone starts to vibrate on the table. It is Christopher.

"Just call to say I love you."

"Eh... that is sweet of you. I am having coffee with Simone, want to join us?"

"No, thanks. I have to work. And I will be late tonight, but I will try to sleep in the flat OK?"

"OK."

"I need you."

"Good luck at work."

"Can I speak to Simone please? I need to give her the address of a flat she can visit next week." Leila hands over the phone, gives her a piece of paper and a pen.

"It will be around the corner! I am so excited."

"But you need to see it first right?"

"Yes, I really want a flat with balcony, this one has a balcony."

"That is nice."

"He sounded... well.. tipsy on the phone."

"Yep, party starts very early for him, and I hope he didn't give you the wrong address."

"Is he getting any better?"

"No. "

"But he will, right?"

"Don't know don't care."

"Are you giving it another shot?"

"I miss my single life. I fucking miss it. I miss living alone, come and go as I please, take a vacation whenever I want and have ONS with whom I want, when I want, where I want. If I don't feeling like doing dishes, I could just leave it. And if I want to be alone, I should be able to just be alone! This had been my life, but now I feel this part of me has gone missing, hibernated, died. It is not living with someone causes me pain, I just grieve over my single life."

Out of whim, Leila picks up the phone and calls Jake, asks him if she could come over. "It would be a pleasure." he replies.

"Are you having an affaire?"

"Simone, come on, me? No."

"Not yet?"

"Why does it matter? But it'd be my call."

"Cold blooded little thing! You play them like toys." She means it like a joke but it somehow doesn't feel like one to Leila.

So, this is the "revenge" you have been looking for? The way to take out your anxiety? The evidence of your liberty? Leila lies in bed, feeling Jake's hand running through her spine. Feist's album softly playing, window open, his paintings and portraits on the wall, this, all of this, is what had been missing. The art, an artistic side of someone. But out of blue, she gets dressed and is ready to leave.

"Stay. Just for a while."

"I have to go."

"Do I see you tomorrow? I will make us some nice meals and we can play video games, or take a walk.I can show you more of my work once I get everything unpacked."

"I don't know. Sorry, I really don't."

"Already feel lonely without you."

"Have a good afternoon. We will talk later."

Lying on the river bank, Leila doesn't pay attention to anyone, anything. She watching the clouds gathering above her. It smells like rain in the air.